In the Harry Potter Without Harry Potter

Chapter 444: The past (2 in 1)

Jon and Lily had found an inn together to stay at near Spinner's End.

Lily did act less impatient than Jon had expected and looked ready for a protracted bout with Snape here.

They didn't use the Apparition to move back and forth between Britain and France as often, that would have been too obvious of a target to be sure, and there was no way anyone could guarantee that the Department of Magical Transportation within the British Ministry of Magic wouldn't resume its normal work.

After a night's rest, Lily went out early in the morning after breakfast and started wandering down Spinner's End as if taking a walk.

Instead of using her original identity again, she and Jon both drank a polyjuice potion together and turned into two middle-aged Muggle men, acting as if they had come here on a trip.

Jon had actually just treated this trip as a trip, his duty that Dumbledore had given him was to just look after Lily and not worry about anything else, that previous trip to bring the Dursleys back to France had been considered overtime.

And Lily didn't look like she was looking for Snape, she looked more like she was reacquainting herself with a city that already seemed a little strange to her.

She hadn't been back here since she had started a family with James, let alone the near decade or so of exile in Britain that had left her with no chance or time to revisit her old hometown.

Jon's recollection from earlier was somewhat faulty; the Snape family had lived in Spinner's End, but Lily's family had not lived in this narrow lane before, but in a house not far off it.

Now that house had changed owners, and Lily took Jon to just look at the house from a distance for a few moments and then left from there, it didn't look like she was going to bother the current owners of the house and go in for a visit.

It was close to 11 am when they arrived at an emerald green area that seemed out of place in a city that was almost entirely grey.

Some small children were playing on the field, and there seemed to be a peaceful calmness around the area.

Lily didn't walk any further but sat down with Jon on a nearby bench to rest, and she looked at the children playing on the field and whispered to Jon.

"Interested in hearing my story? Jon."

Jon raised an eyebrow, he could actually sense a significant difference in Lily's mood from before they had arrived in Britain.

It wasn't just a hatred towards Snape and to hunt him down, it was mixed with a sense of remembrance and sadness.

He snapped his fingers.

"Sure, but it'll have to wait, Professor."

He got up and walked over to a nearby cart that sold desserts and asked for two cones, then rejoined the bench and handed one of them to Lily.

Lily looked at the dessert he handed her with some obvious hesitation as to whether to reach out and take it, only for Jon to shove it into her hand without a word.

"Well! Professor, don't be so formal, you're going to tell me a story, so we don't have to limit our status to that of teacher and student now do we? Besides, before you know you're going to taste something bitter, of course, you have to neutralise it with something sweet."

Watching Jon wink at her as he spoke, Lily didn't hesitate any longer and took hold of the cone Jon had shoved into her hand, taking just a shallow taste before continuing.

"Actually, when I brought you out of that orphanage, Jon, I had a feeling you didn't look like a normal boy."

Jon mumbled vaguely as he took half of what he was holding in one bite.

"That proves that you are still capable of taking divination classes on part-time bases, Professor."

"Well, perhaps I may have been thinking at the time that if Harry were to survive that year he would actually be able to attend Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry the same year that you were picked up."

Her voice sounded what she would call calm as she chatted about this.

But if anyone met her gaze, they could see the pain that passed through the already lost and unfocused gaze.

He knew that Lily's depression could not be soothed by a few playful words from him and that all he had to do was to be a good listener.

"I was actually grateful to Snape until I was completely disappointed in him."

Lily's voice was low and calm.

"My parents were both muggles, and I was actually quite overwhelmed when I showed my talent for magic at home at a young age when I was nine years old and thought I was suffering from some strange illness. It was around that time that I met Snape, who was my age, right here, on this grassy field that didn't fit in with the city."

"He was the one who told me everything there was to know about magic and helped me learn that I am in fact a wizard and not some freak that Petunia was talking about. You should have found out when you picked up the Dursleys that Petunia didn't like me at all, in fact, we were very close as children, and it was only from the time I found out that I was different from everyone else that our relationship grew cold."

"The whole thing had something to do with Snape too, after all, we were more of a different kind of human being, and it made her feel as if she was becoming redundant. Snape took it personally at the time and told me that Petunia was jealous, jealous that we could wield magic and go to Hogwarts. That was the first time I ever lectured him about something, and he didn't seem to care much about it, but instead spent the rest of the day afterwards talking to me with gusto about the marvels of magic and the wonders of Hogwarts."

"I learned a lot from him, and we became the closest of friends, even at Hogwarts, even though I was in Gryffindor, and he was in Slytherin, two houses that were like arch enemies, we remained as close friends as we ever were. Even when I was surrounded by friends who were advising me to keep my distance from the Slytherins and his friends who were advising him to ignore the Gryffindors, it never got in our way."

"And then what circumstances made such a change?"

She looked over to the green field of grass as if remembering what had happened in the castle in the first place.

"He was introduced to Hexes and Jinxes when he first entered Hogwarts at the age of eleven and knew more of those dark magics than even some of the seventh years. But at that time I didn't think it was a big deal, the Unforgivable Curse is dark magic, but then again dark magic isn't just limited to the Unforgivable Curse, even in Gryffindor at that time there were many students using hexes to pull pranks on people. But Snape was really talented in dark magic, and by the fourth year he was able to create his own new dark spell, the Langlock spell that you used before. But at the time I still thought it was nothing until he started getting involved with people I really didn't like, Avery, Mulciber, and later on even Evan Rosier, Wilkes and Bellatrix Lestrange who you killed; all of them were firm supporters of the bloodline theory long before Voldemort had gained popularity."

"And at the same time, he was delving deeper and deeper into dark magic, not just limiting himself to Hexes and Jinxes, but starting to move on to more dangerous curses, and I warned him that he should better stay away from his so-called friends, people who had actually been in contact with Voldemort on the outside world while he was at school, some like Lucius Malfoy, who joined the Death Eaters straight after graduation; and Snape, who was on campus at that time, still kept good correspondence with him."

"Snape agreed to my words perfunctorily, paying lip service and saying that all those friends of his were really no big deal and that they would be reformed by people like me later on, yet integrating into their circle while getting more obsessed with the study of dark magic. It annoyed me to no end during that time, I didn't know if Snape knew what he was really doing or not, and I didn't know if I would still consider him a friend if he did join the ranks of Voldemort as well as those of Lucius Malfoy."

Jon had finished the cone in his hand, and he didn't open his mouth to remind Lily that if she didn't care for the cone in her hand soon those whipped creams were going to completely fizzle out, because he knew the story had come to its turning point.

"Finally, in the middle of a bullying session where he was humiliated, he called me by a moniker." Lily's voice was flat, sounding like she didn't actually have much spite for that moniker, "Just as I was spitefully cursing James and helping him defend his name to the people around me, he called me a mudblood."

"At that point I was angry, so I lashed back at him and called him Snivellus as well. It was from that point on that I started to realise that there was really no way for us to get along like we used to. He had chosen a different path, one that I couldn't accept and there was no way he could be with me like before, and that's when I cut ties with him, but he didn't seem to realise it and apologised to me after that day, saying he didn't mean to call me that. To which I didn't accept, because it wasn't even supposed to be that he had to make an apology, but he had to change his mind."

"Then later on I got together with his nemesis James and to be honest I never thought I would accept James until the sixth year, as he seemed so stuck up, uncaring and violent at school. Snape was never going to turn back, he resented the half of his father's blood that made him different, that's why he recognized the Prince name as a symbol of his pureblood, that's why he was obsessed with dark magic and Voldemort's theories, he was so close to the real pureblood wizards, even in Hogwarts he was always in contact with the Death Eaters. He was nice, but he was only nice to me, and I had no right to accuse or resent him for anything, and all I could think of at that time was that since there was no way we could be friends anymore, we would just go our separate ways and not be involved with each other in the future."

Lily lowered her head, she didn't look anywhere else as the next part of the story was about to involve the biggest scar in her heart.

"After graduating from Hogwarts, James and I got married, and although we didn't join the Order of the Phoenix straight away at that time, we had a deep relationship with Dumbledore and the Order. By that time Voldemort had become very influential in Britain, abusing muggle wizards and wreaking havoc everywhere, and I was considered to be one of his targets along with James, but we were lucky enough to escape. And that's when, as I expected, Snape didn't change a thing, he joined the Death Eaters straight after graduating from Hogwarts and became a lackey under Voldemort. Being able to be under that man can be more than simply expressing one's support and allegiance to the Bloodline theory."

"They're a bunch of terrorists, and if you want to be one, you have to have blood on your hands." Lily's voice began to grow noticeably colder as she said this, "I heard a lot about him over the years, such as which Muggle abuses he was involved in, which Muggle areas he attacked, or what more glorious deeds he did for his lord. James never regretted the things he did to Snape when he was a student, Long before he started targeting Snape, he was already leaning towards those people, but James knew I was in no position to accuse Snape of anything and so never asked me to join him in saying anything nasty."

"And then that night happened."

A slight tremor was evident in her ever-so-calm voice that she couldn't control as she uttered the words.

Jon was silent as well.

"Voldemort came to my house, James got in front of me and Harry, and then he died." Lily's hand was clenched tightly, the knuckles visibly white from overexertion.

"I knew there was nothing I could do to resist, I begged and pleaded humbly, begging the man to spare Harry, to kill me, but to let Harry live. At first, he acted extremely impatient, and I was so agitated and nervous that I could feel some strange change in the magic in my body as a result of the emotions, a change as it connected to Harry, and maybe it would save Harry's life!"

"But it was at that moment that things suddenly went wrong."

Lily said with a sudden shudder and incredulity.

Jon also held his breath at this point, as the only living party that night, Lily must have known exactly what had happened to cause the turn of events.

"It was like he was suddenly a different person, not with a look of impatience, but calm, surprised and thrilled. Then, instead of using magic, he grabbed a broken table leg off the floor and just knocked me out."

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