Coeus?

Chapter 80: ~Shadow of the past.~

Most people are prisoners. A cage doesn't need bars of steel. A cage doesn't need to be around you. That's why they don't realise that they are caged. They are prisoners of their imagination. So they need others to tell them what's right and wrong.

-Unknown

***Sol, Aether, 31 years ago***

***Sadina***

This formula doesn't work, no matter what I do. I pivot my chair to look at the miniature singularity which is hovering in the centre of my laboratory. Four spikes on robotic arms stabilize the singularity from each of the room's corners and provide safety in case of malfunctions. The singularity itself is too small to be visible. All I can see is the effect which is caused by the lensing effect which is caused by the gravitation.

If I were able to get this to work, it would solve all our energy issues. But right now I am still at a point where I need more energy to keep the singularity stable than I can harvest from it.

In theory I should be able to generate radiation by throwing mass into the event horizon of my gravitational anomaly. Calling it a real singularity is wrong, but it's the closest to the real thing without inventing a new designation. The problem lies in making it strong enough to break up the mass while gaining a surplus of energy. Right now the entire process is less than efficient. Nobody would want to deal with the additional effort of generating the complicated spells to create the singularity while having to keep it in check.

I sigh. At least it is stable right now. Either I have to find a way to capture the generated energy better, or I have to make the formation spells even more efficient.

Even if my research doesn't blossom into a new energy source, the miniature gravitational lens might be usable to improve optic sensor arrays. A look at the clock tells me that I am late. I shut down the computer and set the machinery which projects the singularity to automatic stabilization. The spikes which are responsible for the stabilizing effect fold back to their safety positions.

It would be too much of a hassle to shut down the entire singularity each day. I would have to dissipate the energy slowly over a time period of several hours. Otherwise the compressed matter would cause an explosion upon releasing the pressure too fast. I am not working with a lot of mass, just a few micrograms. But that means that the energy inside the spell formation could still cause a sizeable explosion.

I collect my stuff and set out to meet with Eduard. Then I leave the lab and lock the room with my security code.

I am really excited about our meeting because I invested a lot of time in training with my mother. Once Eduard hears about my new skills in regards to shrouding magic he will have no other choice than to admit that techno-mages have their strengths.

His entire reasoning for ending our relationship sounds fishy in the first place. It seems like he wants to push me away because he wants to protect me. I understand that he is aiming for a government position and law enforcement.

Those jobs can get quite dangerous at times. Especially since the Revelation Wing is turning more aggressive recently. But Ed also has to understand that I don't care for the danger and that I am my own person.

Wherever he might end up, I don't care as long as I can be with him.

I exit the building with the university's research labs and head towards the plaza. It is a busy evening and there are a lot of people on the street. I smile at a pair whom I know personally. They aren't quite friends to me, but during classes we shared a table for several months.

That's when a burst of air suddenly tilts my world sideways. I and many other people stumble as the gravity suddenly decides to change and for a brief moment I fall. Not towards the ground, but back towards the building I just exited half a minute ago.

An explosion tears my world apart and I am pushed away as the entire building is torn asunder. With horror I realize that something must have gone wrong. What have I done?

While I tumble end over end through the air I come to the conclusion that the explosion must have been caused by my own research. I was the only one who played with gravity.

As I watch, the pair whom I know is hit by one of the building's fragments and buried beneath it. I want to scream, but my ability only allows me to watch the moment in slow motion. Everything is happening too fast for my body to react. I can't even cast a spell.

In silent resignation I close my eyes and hope for a quick death. It would be easier than what I would have to endure by the authorities after causing the death of so many. Then I hit a wall on the opposite side of the street and the world turns blissfully dark...

...

I open my eyes and scream. Everything hurts! Then I remember and notice that I wasn't knocked out for long. The remains of the research faculty are burning and there are people on the street, trying to help others who scream and mourn like myself. No professional personnel has arrived yet.

Somehow I manage to get to my knees. What have I done? Tears sting my eyes and I find myself stumbling towards a side street, shrouding myself with a spell.

A few streets later the strength leaves my feet and I lean against a wall, sliding to the ground. I cover my face with my hands and realize that I have a big laceration on my forehead. A mad laugh escapes me and I realize that the tears are my own blood running down my face.

After a while I stop and gasp for air. What's wrong with me? Why did I run? Aren't I making everything worse? I didn't think. But I don't have time to explore the reasoning behind my actions.

Sadina? Are you okay?

A deep, male voice sounds from directly in front of me and I look up, realizing that I am not alone any more. An elderly mage with white hair is standing in front of me.

I try to get up, but fail. Sanguin? What are you doing here?

The elder kneels down and cups my chin in his hand, looking at my wound. I was looking for you. We have to treat the injury.

I push his hand away and this time I want to cry for real. Out of shock, out of anguish. It is my fault. You were right when you said that my research is too dangerous! They are dead! I try to wipe the tears and the blood out of my face. My head hurts more and more as the adrenaline slowly stops working.

You made a mistake. That doesn't mean that your life is over. Sanguin answers.

I chuckle. Oh, please. I bent the rules and practised dangerous research on campus grounds. There must have been several deaths at the site and even more wounded. They will have my head for this! At the very least they will wipe my memories! I can't let that happen! I had so many plans! I will forget Ed! My friends! My life!

I could help you. Sanguin places a hand on my shoulder. If they are condemning you for performing that research, then I also have to take the blame because I knew about it. I didn't warn you off strongly enough. Work for me. If we redeem ourselves, then we might be forgiven. I have a plan. His voice sounds soothing and reassuring.

My heart tightens in my chest when I think about my meeting with Ed. How?

If you achieve something great they might forgive you. Become my secret agent in taking down the Revelation Wing. He bites onto his lower lip. But not as you are now. The current you wouldn't be able to achieve that goal. You are too... His voice trails off.

I wipe the blood out of my eyes and find my hand shivering uncontrollably. Say it! I am a wreck! Aren't I?

The Revelation Wing has certain selection criteria. I'll have to prepare your mind for you to infiltrate their organisation. Then I'll provide you with an escape route and a way to get into contact with them. He reaches for my temples. You have to let your guard down. I promise that I'll work hard in order for you to regain your life. There are people in history who were forgiven worse for great accomplishments.

I am confused. Why? I try to focus, but the headache makes it really hard to think logically.

Just relax. I'll make the pain go away. Sanguin lightly touches my head with his cool hands and the pain indeed eases a little.

Then our minds make contact and I feel the tendrils of his mind invading my inner self. It's nothing like the contact I had with Eduard. Eduard was open where Sanguin is keeping me away. Then he suddenly rips at me, shoving around desires and intentions! It feels like I am torn apart while he tries to reforge the being who calls herself Sadina.

I claw at his mind, but he is hiding behind a firm wall of concentration while I in return let my guard completely down. My fight was already lost before it began! I curse my weakness, my pain. How could I have been so stupid because of a few injuries? What is he trying to do?

Sanguin tears out my ambitions and replaces them with a desire to destroy everything which threatens my society, no matter the cost. New knowledge appears inside my head. Access-codes, Names, places.

Then I realize that I am nothing more than a tool to him. One to be discarded once it has outlived its usefulness. I scream and try to shove him away, but his grip on me is too strong.

I lash out with everything I have. All I get is a short reprieve. Hastily I correct the damage he has done.

Remembering the lessons with my mother I cast a fine web of connections over my mind to slow him down. I shrink in on myself to protect the core of my being, hiding inside a self-imposed cage of will. A small safety copy of myself so to speak, a hidden drive. A mirror image inside my mind. I activate all diversion tactics I can think of. This is the worst scenario! Something all telepaths fear!

Then Sanguin's mind returns and resumes his work, editing the other me as he wishes. I still try to fight him, but all I manage is a little nudge here and a small change there. He isn't trying to make me into a slave or a zombie. If he did so, the other me wouldn't be able to act as his unknowing agent. The other me gets changed while all I can do is watching in horror. This is worse than being a slave! I am a split personality who doesn't even know that it is working for someone else.

Despite my horror I try to fight him. I plant a hidden suggestion here, a wish there. Everything from within the safety of my cage, hoping that he doesn't notice my diversion. It is a hope for the future, no more, no less.

He sets a set of instructions which allows him to influence the other me without her knowledge. His perfect agent, not even knowing that she is one.

Halfway during the process I realize that his instructions are far too precise. He must have done it before. Is he the one who caused my singularity to go out of control!? He must have planned it! Why else would he have all those details for my escape readily at hand? And the contacts with the Revelation Wing!

In the end I manage to divert one of his manipulations into a wish which could be the seed for his downfall. A determination to create the strongest techno-mage. The best of them all. One who can only end at the top. To get to the top of the pyramid he will have to push someone else off of it. A bitter smile forms on my lips.

Sanguin finishes his work with a smile. Another agent of stability. He gets to his feet and walks away.

I... no. The other me awakes from its paralysis and gets to her knees. I see through my... her eyes, feel through her skin. I try to retake control, but nothing happens. I am caged inside my own mind while the other me which was forged to Sanguin's expectations stands up and walks down the street. She has a plans and a goals, not even knowing that they don't belong to her. They belong to Sanguin and, in a small part, they belong to me. How she will realise those wishes and ambitions is entirely up to her.

A smile steals itself onto her face. She has so much to do, so she walks faster.

I rattle at the bars of the mental cage which is protecting the real me and imprisoning it at the same time. From here on all I can do is watch.

Then I scream.

.