A Villainess Should Be Strong

Chapter 110: Downpour of Emotions

"I've never wanted to be the Goddess. Never. Who knows why I have her soul in me?"

"What's with all of you shitty bastards? Constantly putting me through pain just to achieve your goals. One is a mastermind who played the role of a good kid while waiting for the perfect chance to strike, the other is a batshit crazy fucker that can't seem to let people live peacefully. What the hell? Am I supposed to go through this and take everything in without complaining?"

Estelle poured in her heart and soul into her speech. She was choking up while she said her words.

She, too, wanted to antagonize people.

Isn't she the villainess? She should be the one making people hurt. Why is that she's the one hurting?

She disliked pain.

She didn't want to go through pain. If anything, what was the basis of all this mess?

Why did it turn like this?

She wasn't even legal, yet she was exposed to so much betrayal and pain. Yes, within her laid an adult's soul, but that didn't apply to this world.

"Answer, you dumbass. How's the pain? Isn't it great? Don't you feel good? No? Then why would you subject me to pain? Because I'm not you? Fucking bastard, do you want to die?" Estelle raged, tears slowly pooling in her eyes.

How unfair.

She was the one who went through all the pain.

She wasn't Estraea yet. Why do all of them only care for the Goddess? What was she?

She was forcibly put into this awkward position, where was her say in this matter?

It was disgusting.

So disgusting that she wanted to give up over and over again every time she was tired of all the bullshit that gets hurled at her.

But she didn't do it.

Because she didn't want to give up entirely.

She wanted to prove that her, the current Estelle Clareste, was also real.

The current her hadn't accepted Estraea as a formal part of her. She only recognized Reina and Estelle.

How could they not acknowledge her current life and keep brooding over the Goddess?

"Make it make sense," Estelle sucked in a breath of dry air and subjected Heine to further torture.

Somehow, his screams sounded gratifying.

But why is it that her heart panged with a sharp pain every time he elicited a maddened scream?

Why is it that she was also going crazy as Heine suffered?

Estelle wanted to shut her mind off and become apathic. So that she wouldn't be swayed by her emotions any longer.

Yes.. the complete opposite of the sunny Goddess Estraea. She preferred being someone like Reina better.

She would lose her emotions, but it would bring her much benefits, wouldn't it?

She wanted to voice out the injustice that she had been feeling for so long, and yet she couldn't. She didn't know who to blame. Everyone was at fault. According to the past, then her past life also had faults.

This cursed cycle of events, she wanted to break it.

Break everything. Erase everything. Reset it from the very start and recreate everything.

Through doing that, she would be killing millions upon millions of lives, but the ending would be better, no?

(A/N: Uh oh is Estelle Thanos' daughter?)

"I've been the one who was suffering even though I didn't do anything wrong. Heine, I used to trust you. But I don't know what polluted your head to the point where you went insane like this," Estelle's tears dripped down to Heine's body as she further inflicted pain to the man.

She cried, and cried along with Heine's melodious pained screams. With each sob, her hands traveled further and caused the marks on Heine's body to disperse even further.

"Can't we just live separately? Can't they just let Estraea go? Leave her and me alone? Can't you forget your life as Astarte? I, too, want to focus on my life as Estelle. Nobody else. How great would that be? I would forget about Hikari without bothering to focus on revenge. I won't be chased down by insane fuckers like you just to satisfy your purpose. I will actually gain freedom and independence. As Estelle Clareste, not Goddess Estraea's incarnation,"

"Fuck. I feel so pent up. How in the hell..." Estelle ruffled her hair, tousling it as she glanced at her status and back to the ring that wrapped itself around her ring finger.

She couldn't even bother holding the abundant amount of curses that floated in her head back.

It was too stressful.

This ring. During her flashback, she had encountered it. The exact same ring.

If she recalled correctly, in her memory flashback, there was also a pair of earring granted to her. The jewelry's whereabouts were unknown, but Estelle suspected that it had a great meaning, judging from the fact that it was given by the Absolute himself when she was first created.

As long as she had this ring, she could be said to have not broken everything off with her past life's ties. With the Goddess she once was in her previous life.

Even so, there was something too convenient about all this.

How could the ring be mysteriously placed in the Duke's study? If it's the Goddess' ring, how come it was in the mortal realm- the Surface? Why was the initials 'SV' present and what did it entail?

The previous Duchess, what secrets did she hold? Estelle couldn't help but want to investigate everything down to the smallest details.

There were so many things Estelle wished she could ask.

Even after growing this much, her line of fate was still controlled to a certain degree.

At least, she was sure that if she didn't proceed with what was scheduled for her, she would die.

Estelle gritted her pain as she looked back at Heine, who was still suffering. The marks had now blackened up and racing to go upwards, wanting to be puked out.

Heine whimpered, shaking his head as he felt the load pile up in his throat and not allowing any air to pass through.

He had to vomit it. But the moment he vomited, it would not end prettily. Heine was already in so much pain after her internals were damaged because of the marks. More injuries than this and he wouldn't be able to recover fully.

Estelle calmly stood by the side.

As much as she wanted to help him, she was quite the petty person.

So be it. The man reaped what he sow.

If only he didn't try to do his own plans outside of the 'safe' ones the Absolute and Goddess Estraea's former lover planned to do, he wouldn't be in this predicament, would he?

Estelle wouldn't have been hurt and betrayed so far, would she?

Everything would end up in her recovering her true identity as Goddess Estraea.

Although she still wasn't convinced, she had to pull through for this time.

There would be a day where she could get the perfect revenge, but it wasn't now.

Now, she had to focus on bettering and preparing herself for what's to come.

Estelle sighed, looking with an absent gaze to the scene happening outside the window.

Despite being a Duke, Duke Miller didn't actually have a wide area of territory. In fact, his land was smaller than most nobles.

His Duke title came from being the predecessor of a devoted noble servant to the late, late King.

Although he wasn't all that influential, he was loyal in one of the major events in the kingdom's installation.

The Miller head at that time was very close with the King who reigned. They could be considered best friends. They met at the Royal Academy, where most noble humans went to pursue education and got along very well.

They shared the same ideologies, too.

Following this same path, the current Duke Augustine Miller met her father in a similar way. In the Royal Academy, in which they found out that they shared similar tendencies that led to them developing an amiable relationship and good friendship.

Estelle's murderous intent spread to everybody because of her pent up thoughts in addition to the black marks' negative energy. She let out a desperate sigh as she yanked her hair to regain her calm even the slightest bit.

She had to find out about more things.

She was now in the Duke's manor, a place where she originally meant to go to.

It was at this moment that she recognized the fact that she had parted with Lylia after telling her not to search for her once she disappeared. In this case, Heine really got lucky.

Lylia wouldn't notice anything strange since she did instruct her to not tell everyone.

"Haah.. This is ridiculous," Estelle cupped her face dejectedly, wondering if she would ever go anywhere with her plans.

Did she have to revise it? Perhaps she focused on too many things. Realistically speaking, she should set up a logical goal for

herself. What was her current goal?

In any case, her original line of plans were definitely done for.

However, she did achieve her goals of unlocking the seals. That was great.

Just as she was prepared to inspect the problem further, a voice came.

"Who are you?!" A man's voice interrupted.

Estelle turned around, wondering who dares to disrupt her rage.

However, once her eyes landed onto the man, she scrunched up her face. It was a familiar one.

[He is..] Estelle recognized the man.

"You're... the Duke's son, correct? The heir apparent," Estelle sized the man up, letting go of her bloodlust after she confirmed his identity.

A murderous intent flashed through her eyes as she put up a fake smile, ready to take on the intruder in her and Heine's lovely reunion.